"A gentle answer turns away wrath,
But a harsh word stirs up anger.
The tongue of the wise commends knowledge;
But the mouth of the fool gushes folly.
The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life,
But a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit.
The lips of the wise spreads knowledge,
Not so the hearts of fools"
Verses 1, 2, 4, and 7
Again it's obvious to me what is important to take away from this chapter just from the amount of text used: God is concerned with what we say? Maybe that is because what we say is different that what we think because our words go beyond our own selves. But, this is double-edged, with the ability to harm or help.
No doubt since Susan and I will be spending the rest of our lives together that we might use the largest proportion of our words over our lifetimes in communicating with one another. If not, certainly the conversations will have a different meaning and weight than with co-workers and friends. That means then that I have to think before I speak. I guess a married man doesn't need the Bible to confirm that truth, but here I think it is really telling me to consider my tone and demeanor when I speak with Susan so that we don't start irrelevant fights because of a stupid off hand comment or an unneeded tone; to be a source of comfort to her and to keep all lies from my mouth; and to make sure that when I speak that I know facts rather than guessing. Maybe this is even telling me to avoid gushing folly from my mouth like a fool. That sounds awfully close to advice I have heard before; that women want men to listen and not to react. I guess God knows all these things long before we do and in his subtle ways He is telling me everything I need to know about women if I simply search for His intent.
-Bob
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Congratulations, Bob...on reaching the half-way point of your committment to God...and Susan! I have been reading right along with you and thought I would chime in with my "Half-Time" comments.
ReplyDeleteProverbs, as life application study of God's wisdom, is so rich and full that any one chapter could consume a month..for that matter..any one verse! It is great to be reminded of the contrasts of good/evel, wisdom/folly, idustrious/lazy, discerning/gullible, generous/stingy, content/greed, patience/hot-tempered, humility/pride and spiritual/materialistic (and the list goes on!).
They are so very obvious as we read them. Yet are they not difficult at times to obey? Why?
Perhaps because so many of Proverbs' challenges are contrary to our human nature...to this generational time...and, to some degree, to the American precept of self-assuredness and self-determination. It's not that self confidence and individual actions are bad in themselves...but they have their place...and need to be judiciously applied in relationships - especially the marriage relationship.
Many of Proverbs' predictions of success for the wise and demise of the foolish or evil are witnessed in this world.. Many are not. We only occasionally see the crumbling internal strife of those who partake in ill-gotton gain..or practice Godless acts. Sure the media reports on the "biggies", like a "star" entering drug rehab or a politician's wayward ways, but we are not privy to the everday lives involved.
Each individual, meanwhile, is actively LIVING that life of peace or stress as they choose. This is where the rubber meets the road. As Proverbs intones, the Godly still encounter stressful situations. However, trust in God, as extending into the hereafter, can weather these storms under a blanket of unwordly peace. Contrast that with the reports of internal strife, drug addiction, and dysfunctional relationships of many of the "rich and famous" or even the "wild and crazy" who are perhaps not so rich and famous.
Focusing down on how Proverbs guides a single relationship - such as in a marriage - is easy to do...but will take some effort to accomplish! What can make it possible for our selfish human heart to transition to a place of selfless-ness? It is only through a) God's help and b) by nuturing genuine love and respect for your spouse.
One part of any successful marriage, as reinforced by my reading of Proverbs to date, is the precept that you develop, cherish, and grow a desire to serve another's (your spouse's) needs. This is contrary to human nature, as we see such "giving" as a depletion of our own resources and desires. In a healthy marriage relationship, however, nothing could be further from the truth! In a right relationship, your spouse will have the same attitude, resulting in a loving replenishment of each other's needs. How much sweeter is the fullfillment of our hearts desires and needs through the loving action on another than through selfish action!
I am excited for the both of you, Bob and Susan, and hope that you two will increasingly discover the gift of giving to each other. In that, I am confident that the wisdom of the Proverbs will richly bless your marriage!
David
As I read chapter 19 here are few thought.
ReplyDelete19:14
19:8
19:17
I am reading along wth you and praying for both of you. I am excited that you both are willing to seek God's guidence in your life'e journey.
John C